50 Times “Idiots At Work” Showed Just How Stupid Humans Can Be

50個(gè)老外在工作期間令人目瞪口呆的 “大聰明”行為(上)



編輯Adelaide Ross 與 Ieva Pe?iulyt?

Not every employee can be the sharpest tool in the toolbox. In fact, it seems that some of them probably shouldn't be in the toolbox at all...
Below, you'll find some of our favorite posts from the Idiots at Work Instagram page, which features facepalm worthy moments from a wide variety of industries that might make you wonder how these employees haven’t been fired yet. So enjoy scrolling through this list of stupidity, and be sure to upvote the choices that made you lose a bit of faith in humanity!

并不是每位員工都是你工具箱里最銳利的工具,感覺(jué)有些工具根本就不應該出現在工具箱里……
以下內容均收集于Instagram,你會(huì )在這里發(fā)現某些員工在上班期間所做出的為“大聰明”的行為,每個(gè)行業(yè)都有個(gè)別令人眼前一黑的”騷操作”的打工人,令人不禁想這種人怎么還未被給開(kāi)除!
#1 自行車(chē)專(zhuān)用道

Stupid-People-Work
Marcos Valencia
This must be a joke.

這是開(kāi)什么玩笑

?imon ?pa?ek
I hope that this sign was somewhere else and some prankster moved it.

這個(gè)電子告示牌咋放到道中間呢?不會(huì )是哪個(gè)愛(ài)搞惡作劇的搬過(guò)來(lái)的吧!

Spannermonkey (edited)
From the licence-plate and car model, this pic was taken in the state of New South Wales, Australia. Given all the possible combinations of incompetence, apathy and ill-will towards cyclists, I have no trouble believing this is real.

從車(chē)牌以及車(chē)形來(lái)看,這張照片很可能是在澳大利亞新南威爾士州拍的??紤]那里管事的以及對騎行者不友好的態(tài)度,這完全是有可能是真的。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


My O My (edited)
I've seen signs like this in real life

現實(shí)生活中我真見(jiàn)過(guò)這種事

Mrs Irish Mom
Yeah give them space on the road because they need to go around this stupid sign

好嘛,倒是留點(diǎn)地方啊,誰(shuí)來(lái)不都得繞過(guò)這個(gè)蠢告示牌啊

Patsy Robins 1 hour ago
Common sight in Australia, unfortunately.

不幸的是,這種事澳大利亞很常見(jiàn)。
#2 “感恩”(請不要有邪惡的想法)

Stupid-People-Work
Sum Guy
That's how superman takes his payment for saving the world

這就是超人拯救世界后所得到的回饋

HelluvaHedgehogAlien
The door is on the left… thank you /jk

請左邊屋子里進(jìn),謝謝

Farah Kamal
oh my gawd

好家伙

Lsai Aeon
This roller rink saw the memes and repainted that wall a few years ago

這里是旱冰場(chǎng),這面墻幾年前就已重新刷過(guò)了!

CD Mills
They just needed to run this by ONE teenage boy before painting!

他們只需要在畫(huà)它之前讓一個(gè)十幾歲的男孩過(guò)來(lái)驗證一下即可!

Chewie Baron
I’ll volunteer as tribute!

我甘愿“奉獻”

Regina Holt
well, you've got two choices for a liquid here

好吧,你有兩種液體可以選擇

JenC
Skate World

溜冰世界

Gabby M 22 minutes ago
Oh my gosh I know this skating rink. I went to a 7th grade bday party there.

好么,我知道這個(gè)溜冰場(chǎng)。我還在那里過(guò)了七歲生日派對。

Couragetcd
Once again, Superman gets all the love and Batman is left on his own...looking on...

再一次,超人得到了所有的愛(ài),只有蝙蝠俠在一旁顧影自憐
#3 (在你離開(kāi)之前別忘了付錢(qián),切記)

Stupid-People-Work
SCP 4666
Before you leave forget to pay. Do not stop!!

當你走之前又忘了給錢(qián)。千萬(wàn)別停(趕緊走)?

MaximumKarmaSaint
*Do Not STOP!!!

“千萬(wàn)別?!?/b>

Lara Verne
Run!

這是讓走嗎!

Couragetcd
I feel like it's missing something. Maybe a, "Don't blx!"

總感覺(jué)少寫(xiě)了些什么。就像是 “別猶豫!”

Javelina Poppers
I was just following orders.

我只是奉命行事。

AJay
Dine and dash

吃霸王餐

Riley Quinn
This reminds me of "Steal This Book" by Abbie Hoffman, 1970. And yes, people did steal the book.

這讓我想起了1970年阿比·霍夫曼寫(xiě)的《偷這本書(shū)》。是的,后來(lái)這本書(shū)確實(shí)被人偷了。

————
We’re all capable of doing some stupid things in our personal lives. We might leave the house wearing a shirt inside out by accident or drive away while our coffee was sitting on the top of our car. But if there’s anywhere that we should be professional and on our game at all times, it’s in the workplace. While on the job, we’re getting paid to not be stupid, so to ensure that we don’t lose our jobs, most of us try to hold it together.

日常生活當中,我們都可能做一些蠢事情。比如不經(jīng)意間反穿襯衫出門(mén),或是開(kāi)車(chē)離開(kāi)時(shí)咖啡還放在車(chē)頂上。但如果有什么地方需要我們時(shí)刻保持職場(chǎng)狀態(tài),那就是工作場(chǎng)所。在工作中,想順利拿到工資就避免做傻事,所以為了確保我們不會(huì )丟掉工作,我們都必須盡力保持清醒敬業(yè)的狀態(tài)。

————

#4“智慧”

Stupid-People-Work
Sum Guy
back-breaking work

身心俱疲

Kaisa Koo
He's a backbone of his community

他可能是這里小區里“頂梁柱”

Corvus
In today's episode of "Why do men live less than women?"...

今日節目詮釋了“為什么女人比男人活的久?”

Delta Dawn
cheerleading tournaments are getting weird

啦啦隊比賽越來(lái)越怪了

Candace
Poor guy is going to have lower back problems!

下面那個(gè)可憐的家伙會(huì )腰疼的!

Pink kitty
This is by far the dumbest!

迄今為止看到過(guò)最蠢操作

Crazy Dog Lady
Definitely OSHA approved.

絕對符合《職業(yè)安全與衛生條例》的標準
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


Oddball
OSHA says "3 points of contact" to do it safely.

《職業(yè)安全與衛生條例》說(shuō)了,想要安全就要“三點(diǎn)著(zhù)地”
#5 地址如下…

Stupid-People-Work
pineapple87
Thanks, I will!

謝謝,我會(huì )去看的

WindySwede
*visiting the site* .. "congrats your hired! You managed to type everything right!"

*訪(fǎng)問(wèn)網(wǎng)站* ..“恭喜你被錄取!”因為你把這么復雜的地址都敲對了!”

Tucker Cahooter
Imagine typing that in accurately and getting HTTP error 404

想象一下,地址若是沒(méi)敲錯的話(huà)。得到的是404 not found 頁(yè)面

Paul K. Johnson
Dammit. That's my phone number. Stop doxxing me, BP!!!!!!

該死的。那是我的電話(huà)號碼??蓜e再騷擾我了,(血壓上來(lái)了)

PFD
Maybe that's the test....

這不會(huì )是在測試吧

Justin Tyme
No problem. Just click on it.

沒(méi)問(wèn)題,點(diǎn)擊一下
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


2x4b523p (edited)
My mom doesn’t know how to copy and paste so when she wants to send me a lix she writes it down on the paper, takes picture and sends the photo to me. It usually looks like this except in her bad handwriting. Edited to add: I have shown her many times how to copy and paste, she can do it and then forgets by the time I walk out of the door.

我媽不知道怎么復制粘貼,每當她想發(fā)給我一個(gè)鏈接地址時(shí),她總是先把鏈接地址寫(xiě)在紙上,然后用相機拍下來(lái)發(fā)給我。她就會(huì )這樣,而且她字寫(xiě)得也不太好。(補充)我已多次教他如何粘貼復制,當時(shí)她能記下來(lái),可我一走她就又忘了怎么弄。

Stefaan De Clerck
I guess that's why qr-codes are used these days.

我想這就是為什么現在要用上二維碼的原因。

Bike Angel
In case you couldn't read that, please feel free to visit Eyecare Specialties in Craig, Colorado!

如果你看不懂,請盡快到科羅拉多州克雷格眼科護理專(zhuān)科就醫!

Edda Kamphues
Please tell me they are looking for an IT expert.

請告訴我,他們是在找IT方面的專(zhuān)家。
#6 到底哪天?

Stupid-People-Work

(圖:此橋將于十月17日至28日期間封閉一天)

pineapple87
Drive forward and find out whether that day is today!

繼續開(kāi),驗證下封路的那一天是不是今天
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


Zoey Bear
It's probably Oct. 29th.

不會(huì )說(shuō)的是10月29日吧

LauraDragonWench
They must've worked for the cable company previously. "We'll be there on Wednesday between 9 am and 6 pm - thanks for your business!"

他們以前一定在有線(xiàn)電視公司干過(guò)?!拔覀儗⒃谥苋衔?點(diǎn)到下午6點(diǎn)之間到您那里,感謝惠顧!”
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


Julie S
Wow that's a really long day.

哇,那絕對是漫長(cháng)的一天。

————
As hilarious as the photos on this list may be, there’s no question that some of them are actually quite dangerous. From bricks flying down the highway without being properly secured to the back of a truck to people balancing on Frankenstein’s monster-esque combinations of ladders, it’s likely that some accidents occured due to what’s going on in these photos.
According to Zippia, about 2.6 million nonfatal workplace accidents and injuries occur each year in the United States. Sprains, strains and tares are the most common injuries to sustain, while overexertion, slips, trips, falls and contact with obxts and equipment account for the vast majority of these injuries.

盡管這篇文章中的圖片可能很搞笑,但毫無(wú)疑問(wèn),其中一些內容實(shí)際上相當危險。從高速公路飛馳卡車(chē)上未固定好的磚塊,到人們在梯子上為保持平衡科學(xué)怪人般的腦洞大開(kāi),這些照片很可能反應出可能將要發(fā)生的問(wèn)題事故。
據Zippia(網(wǎng)站)稱(chēng),美國每年發(fā)生約260萬(wàn)起非致命工傷事件。扭傷、拉傷和撕裂是最常見(jiàn)的工傷,因工作或操作設備而產(chǎn)生的的過(guò)度勞累、滑倒、絆倒、跌倒占這類(lèi)傷害的絕大多數。

原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


————

#7 驚心動(dòng)魄

Stupid-People-Work
AJay
WHY ARE YOU STILL DRIVING BEHIND IT

這咋還不躲啊

Maya Baggins
Never seen Final Destination

這是從沒(méi)看過(guò)系列電影《死神來(lái)了》吧

Sand Ers
They aren't driving behind it. They're stopped behind it.

這不是在跟前面的車(chē)。這車(chē)是在后面停著(zhù)呢。

Isaac Harvey
Great minds think alike, but dumb minds think aliker.

智者見(jiàn)智,愚者見(jiàn)愚
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


Sum Guy
I'm more mad at the person with the phone taking a picture

還有時(shí)間拿手機拍下這景象的人,心是挺大啊

pineapple87
Seems to be taken from the passenger side

好像是從副駕那邊拍的
#8 身殘志堅

Stupid-People-Work
Banana Vic
When you know you should stay home and rest but you gotta get your a*s to your job so you can make enough money to survive....

為養家糊口,即使你知道該呆在家里休息,但你也必須堅持出去工作

Papa
Do they make pickups that are front wheel drive? I don't claim to be a mechanical genius, but I believe that's the only way this could work.

這皮卡是前輪驅動(dòng)的吧?我雖不是機械天才,但我相信這就是唯一可行的方法。

xitxarel·lo Panda 1 hour ago
Is an European plate . And almost all vehicles are front wheel drive, you are Right

看車(chē)牌是歐洲的。哪里的車(chē)基本都是前輪驅動(dòng),你說(shuō)的沒(méi)錯。

Meyrin
Romanian car, not exactly surprised

羅馬尼亞車(chē),一點(diǎn)也不奇怪

Upstaged75
In the US you'd get in big trouble for doing that! It would be a very expensive ticket. Probably for reckless driving.

在美國你要是這樣做,肯定會(huì )惹上大麻煩的! 這會(huì )被認為是魯莽駕駛,能罰死你.

Did I say that out loud? (he/him)cis/het
The UK too, except it wouldn't just be a ticket. The police would seize the vehicle and you would have a court appearance to look forward to.

在英國也一樣,只不過(guò)這不僅僅是一張罰單的問(wèn)題了。警察會(huì )扣你的車(chē),你就成等著(zhù)去接法院傳票吧。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


Isabella
It is from the Ilfov county, which is surrounding Bucharest, Romania.

這是在羅馬尼亞布加勒斯特外面的伊爾福夫縣。
#9 “專(zhuān)業(yè)”

Stupid-People-Work
Paul Scheermeijer
90 degree angle is 90 degree angle. Done.

九十度就九十度…你就說(shuō)是不是直角吧。

varwenea
When you refuse to pay overtime...

當你拒絕發(fā)加班費時(shí)……

CD Mills
I don't see any problem in the future...anyone else?

我覺(jué)得以后不會(huì )出現任何問(wèn)題。其他人怎么認為我不知道?

Olivia Lisbon
Nope, looks fine to me. Quality work, and it shows.

不,我覺(jué)得挺好的。修的多好啊,顯而易見(jiàn)。

Kimbowa
“There! I fixed it.”

這里我給修好了
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


gilded panda
Please don’t be gas please don’t be gas

莫生氣,拜托,千萬(wàn)別氣

————
All of these workplace accidents cost the American people a pretty penny each year, coming in at a whopping $250 billion annually. And in 2022, the Occupational Safety and Health Administration, or OSHA, had a budget of $591,787,000. But of course, not every workplace has an equal level of risk. 15% of injuries that occur while on the job in the US happen in manufacturing jobs, and construction has some of the highest on the job fatality rates. However, line cooks have been found to be at the highest risk of contracting COVID-19 while at work.

因職場(chǎng)工傷每年都要消耗美國人民一大筆支出,每年高達2500億美元。2022年,職業(yè)安全與健康管理局(OSHA)的預算為59178.7萬(wàn)美元。當然,并不是每個(gè)工作場(chǎng)所都有同樣的風(fēng)險。在美國,15%的工傷都發(fā)生在制造業(yè),但建筑業(yè)是死亡率最高的行業(yè)之一??墒?,一線(xiàn)廚師在工作時(shí)感染新冠病毒的風(fēng)險卻為最高。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


————

#10 “緬懷”

Stupid-People-Work
Antonio Jimenez
Irony is dead. Long live irony.

諷刺已死。諷刺萬(wàn)歲。

MaximumKarmaSaint
They will be missed.

我們會(huì )懷念他們的。

Mike F
Hopefully they made it in time to get that last donut!

希望他們能趕上趟拿到最后一個(gè)甜甜圈!

Jan Rosier
forklift has been working 8 hours straight, needs a res

小叉車(chē)已連續工作了8小時(shí),是該休息休息了

Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa)
I'm just trying to figure out HOW?

這到底是咋弄成這樣的?

LizzieBoredom
He probably leaned way out of the forklift to hang up the sign.

可能是站在叉車(chē)上探出身去掛條幅

M W (edited)
I worked for a small, family owned home improvement store in Phoenix as the warehouse manager. One day, one of the owner's sons came into the warehouse and jumped on the stand up forklift we had. He was zipping around just playing, ignoring my requests to stop. He decided to enter the second half of the warehouse, which was through an opening just like the one in the pic. He caused a lot of damage to the forklift and the wall, both resulting in expensive repairs. Owner wrote me up for allowing an untrained person on the lift and never said a word to his son.

我在鳳凰城的一家小型裝修公司當倉庫經(jīng)理。有天,老板一個(gè)兒子跑進(jìn)倉庫,跳上了這里的立式叉車(chē)。這孩崽子玩嗨了,根本不聽(tīng)我們讓他下來(lái)的勸告。他開(kāi)著(zhù)叉車(chē)往倉庫里面亂跑,還想穿一個(gè)門(mén),最后就變成像圖片里的那樣。車(chē)和墻都被撞壞了,花了好多維修費。因為我沒(méi)有制止一個(gè)未經(jīng)訓練的人開(kāi)叉車(chē),而且期間我自始至終沒(méi)對他兒子說(shuō)過(guò)一句話(huà),最后,老板給讓寫(xiě)了一份檢討。

Phoenix
The sign says Thank you for working safely. As I am not working safely, I do not expect to be thanked.

條幅上寫(xiě)著(zhù)“感謝您安全工作”。由于我的工作不安全,所以我不指望得到感謝了。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


North
It has been 0 days since the last accident.

距離上次事故才過(guò)去了0天。
#11 “如綁”

Stupid-People-Work
Donald Crocker, Jr.
There was a vid once with something similar, the truck with bricks hit a bump or something and a brick flew off and went through the windshield of a car going the opposite way on the highway killing a passenger.

以前看過(guò)一個(gè)類(lèi)似的視頻,一輛載著(zhù)磚頭的卡車(chē)撞上了一個(gè)凸起或什么東西墊起來(lái),一塊磚頭順勢飛了出來(lái),炸穿了一輛在高速公路上對面正常行駛的汽車(chē)擋風(fēng)玻璃,砸死了一名乘客。

Pink kitty
How sad

痛心

Sanguinius
Saw that video. It was the guy's mom who died. You can hear him absolutely loosing his mind when he looks at her.

看過(guò)那個(gè)視頻。死的是那人的媽媽。當他看著(zhù)她媽當時(shí)的場(chǎng)面,都瘋了。

LonelyLittleLeafSheep
She was only 29, don't think it was his mother.

那女的才29歲,應該不是他媽。
原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


Kimbowa (edited)
Thank goodness they had that rope.

謝天謝地,他們甚至還給綁了條繩子。

Rainstorm
Why even bother putting that rope there, that does almost nothing

為什么要綁條繩子,有啥用?
#12 痕跡

Stupid-People-Work
Ashlisha
Murder outline of a squirrel.

松鼠的謀殺現場(chǎng)輪廓線(xiàn)。

The Original Bruno
And there's a French restaurant with a job opening, too!

又有一家法國餐廳在招人!
(注:指法國電影《搶劫堅果店》)

Nilsen
Untitled-65b8b0101cfc9.jpeg
————
Not all stupidity in the workplace leads to accidents and fatalities, however. Sometimes, it simply leads to less than brilliant employees losing their jobs. Liz Ryan wrote a piece for Forbes detailing the stupidest things she’s had to fire employees for, and she first notes that someone lost their job for stealing other workers’ lunches. Apparently, when the lunch thief got caught, he told Liz, “I didn’t like this job anyway.”

然而,并非所有在工作場(chǎng)所的愚蠢行為都會(huì )導致事故和傷亡。有時(shí),它只會(huì )導致不那么優(yōu)秀的員工丟掉工作。麗茲·瑞恩曾為《福布斯》寫(xiě)過(guò)一篇文章,詳細列出了她因員工的“大聰明”行為而不得不炒了他們的事情,她首先指出,有人因為偷吃其他員工的午餐而丟了工作。顯然,當那小偷被抓住時(shí),他反而還跟莉茲說(shuō):“反正我也不喜歡這份工作?!?/b>

————

#13 “擺設”

Stupid-People-Work
Surenu
Windows XP Firewall

感覺(jué)就像是WIN XP 里的防火墻一樣

cerinamroth
This has got to be Germany. I see gates like this a lot and it's bizarre. Hide the bins at all costs, but don't be under any illusions that they are safe!

這肯定是在德國。我總能看到這樣式的門(mén),令人疑惑。想方設法吧垃圾箱擋起來(lái),真不知圖的是啥,難道是怕丟!

Bonesko
But how am I supposed to steal their garbage?!

還能有人想偷他家垃圾??

Jack Burton
Now it's just freakin annoying to steal this garbage bin.

現在想偷個(gè)垃圾桶都那么麻煩了。
#14 水上杯托…

Stupid-People-Work
Banana Vic
I love that someone tried to do a bathtub beer....hello, my best friend!

我喜歡一邊泡澡一邊喝啤酒....你好,我最好的朋友!

Tee Pussi
I don't have a bath so I have to drink showerbeers

我家沒(méi)浴盆,所以我只能一邊淋浴一邊喝啤酒

Jason
I feel like that flamingo is my spirit animal.

我覺(jué)得火烈鳥(niǎo)就是我的靈獸。

similarly
in the left pic, more than half of the cup is in the flamingo, so it's more balanced. In the right pic, the cup is significantly taller, which WILL affect balance. The problem isn't necessarily the design of the flamingo (though it could have been better). The real problem is the size of the cup used.

左圖中,杯子至少能塞進(jìn)這個(gè)火烈鳥(niǎo)杯托里一半,所以能保持不倒。而右圖,杯子明顯很高,當然不穩定了。問(wèn)題不一定是火烈鳥(niǎo)杯托的設計(盡管本應設計的更好)。真正的問(wèn)題是杯子的尺寸大小。
#15 “加溫”

原創(chuàng )翻譯:龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.360yingketong.cn 轉載請注明出處


Stupid-People-Work
Marcos Valencia
Lunch time!!!!!

午飯時(shí)間到??!

pineapple87
Sure, leave a blowtorch unsupervised in a room full of flammable materials, why don't you?

當然,在一個(gè)充滿(mǎn)易燃物的屋子里放一個(gè)沒(méi)人看管的噴燈,這是嫌事不大么?

Marcellus II
Time to test those supposedly flame-retardant materials up to building code. You don't want untested stuff in your house, do you?

是時(shí)候測試這些所謂的阻燃材料是否符合建筑標準了。你不想讓未經(jīng)測試的材料用在家里裝修,是吧?

Jill Bussey
Just drying out the insulation.

只是在烘干絕緣材料。

AJay
What are they trying to do here? Start a housefire?

他們想在這里做什么?火燒房子

Marcellus II
My guess is it's too cold either for comfort or for say some glue to set. This is a very unsafe and inefficient space heater...

我猜可能是這屋子里太冷了,要么感覺(jué)不舒服,要么溫度低沒(méi)法粘東西,用這種方式加溫既不安全效率還低。

Regina Holt
i hope that this is photoshop!!!!!!!! I can't imagine someone actually doing this

我希望這圖p的 !!!!!!!!我無(wú)法想象真有人敢這樣做

Full of Giggles
My parents house caught fire because a plumber did something similar. The guy left the torch on and set it next to a wood stud and insulation.

我爸媽家的房子就因為一個(gè)水管工做了類(lèi)似的事情把房子燒了。那家伙把這東西放在了木柱子和絕緣材料旁還沒(méi)閉火一直燒著(zhù)。

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Liz went on to note that she’s fired “about a dozen people for having sex in the electrical closet or the security room or someplace else.” Another employee even invited two “call girls” to his room while on a business trip and charged the expense to a company credit card. There’s nothing wrong with having fun on your own time in your own home (and with your own money), but it is quite idiotic to mix work and play like that.

莉茲接著(zhù)指出,她已開(kāi)除了“大約12個(gè)人,因為他們在電氣柜、保安室或有些地方明目張膽地啪啪”。一名員工甚至在出差期間找了兩名“應召女郎”到他的房間,還吧消費費用都記入公司的賬上。在自己的家里(用自己的錢(qián))享受個(gè)人時(shí)光并沒(méi)有什么錯,但像這樣把工作和娛樂(lè )混在一起的那就太蠢了。